
People feel uncomfortable when they see something different
Staring is part of everyday life and something that everyone does, including people who should know better!
Even people with a difference that is purely cosmetic, like a tattoo or a body piercing that they’ve chosen to change about themselves, will still be stared at by some people. Anything that looks different makes people curious, so they want to look.
People don’t generally tend to stare because they want to upset you. Only a few stare because they’re being rude. Staring is usually about seeing something unfamiliar. We all want to know more about things that we don’t understand, and visible differences are no exception.
Face IT will help you to learn not to take staring too personally. It doesn’t have to stop you making new friends or having a good time.
Have a think about Miranda’s view, she has a highly visible birthmark on her face:

Miranda said:
I’ve learned now that it’s completely natural curiosity, and although sometimes it’s people being mean, sometimes it really isn’t. If you’ve never ever seen anyone with a birth mark before you’ll be curious. I try to notice that about myself too. If I see someone with something I haven’t seen before I’m going to stare too.

People feel concerned for you and don’t know how to react
Seeing a visible difference can also make some people feel concerned for you. Others may feel anxious or embarrassed because they’re not sure how to behave or what to say. You probably don’t want people to pay you extra attention or to feel sorry for you, but it might help to know that these aren’t negative responses, just natural responses.
Many people may not even notice your difference, but if you’re self-conscious you may behave differently and may draw attention to yourself through your body language.
Below are some examples of body language. We’ll talk more about body language in Session 2.
Facial expressions

Gestures

Posture
