Anxiety makes you feel like you want to run away from threatening situations, or stop going out, or avoid socialising with people.

Social anxiety (feeling self-conscious or nervous in the company of people) can make you appear standoffish and rude even if you don’t mean to be! Because you’re too nervous to talk, smile or look people in the eye, people who don’t know you very well can feel rejected and think you don’t like them.

If allowed to get out of control, anxiety can take over your life and leave you feeling lonely.

Different techniques can be used to reduce anxiety, help you relax and make you more likely to succeed when you try and face your fears, you need to find out what works for you.

Testing the water is all about GETTING USED TO situations that make you anxious.

The aim is to force yourself to stay in situations you find scary long enough for anxiety levels to reduce. Relaxation techniques should be used to help you stay put, face your fear and not run! Once you can stick it out, the body gets used to staying and not running away, and then you won’t get so nervous next time.

By rating your fearful situations on a scale from 1 to 10, you can work out which situations are the easiest to attempt first.

Once you’ve become used to the situation at the bottom step, it’s time to move on to the next level. It’s important never to miss steps and not to move up the ladder too quickly.

Below is an example of a fear ladder for a person who wants to wear shorts and a vest top whilst out with friends:

From this example, you can see that each stage is slightly more scary than the last. By following the ladder in this order it’s easier to get used to situations that scare you.